Question

就在昨天外教(Mr. Black)的口語(yǔ)課上, 你(Liu Ming)使用手機(jī)時(shí)被老師發(fā)現(xiàn)，手機(jī)被收走。請(qǐng)用英語(yǔ)給教師寫一封信道歉，內(nèi)容應(yīng)包括以下要點(diǎn)：
(字?jǐn)?shù)：120左右, 信的開頭和結(jié)尾已給出，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù))
1、表示你的歉意;
2、解釋為什么當(dāng)時(shí)使用手機(jī)(說(shuō)出至少一個(gè)理由);
3、提出自己的請(qǐng)求并適當(dāng)表態(tài)。
Dear Mr. Black,
I am really sorry ___________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Best wishes!
Yours sincerely,
Liu Ming

Answer 1

Dear Mr. Black,
I am really sorry about my using the mobile phone in your lecture yesterday. Please accept my heart-felt apology for being so rude a student.
I know any word might sound a make-up excuse. But I didn’t use my mobile phone for no reason. I was trying to (….學(xué)生當(dāng)時(shí)使用手機(jī)的理由….) Therefore, I got no choice but try sending them a text message in class and that was exactly what I was doing when you discovered.
Anyway, using a mobile phone in a classroom was not acceptable to any teacher. I make sure it will not happen again. But I do need my phone back to keep in touch with others.
Will you be so kind as to give it back to me. Thanks a lot!
Best wishes!
Yours sincerely
Liu Ming

試題分析：題目要求寫一封道歉信，向外教道歉。寫作要點(diǎn)包括：表達(dá)歉意；解釋使用手機(jī)的原因；提出請(qǐng)求并作出保證。使用第一人稱進(jìn)行寫作，注意書信的格式和禮貌用語(yǔ)；書寫工整，不要出現(xiàn)標(biāo)點(diǎn)和拼寫錯(cuò)誤，正確使用時(shí)態(tài)和語(yǔ)法知識(shí)。
【亮點(diǎn)說(shuō)明】范文使用了非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞my using the mobile phone，being so rude a student，using a mobile phone；
固定句型：got no choice but try sending them a text message；表語(yǔ)從句what I was doing；賓語(yǔ)從句make sure it will not happen again等語(yǔ)法知識(shí)，顯示了一定的語(yǔ)法基礎(chǔ)；
范文還使用了一些固定短語(yǔ)：keep in touch with；so kind as；give it back to等，使作文內(nèi)容變得充實(shí)；
范文注意使用But，Therefore，Anyway等銜接前后句和上下文，是作文顯得緊湊，前后聯(lián)系緊密。