Question

李華因在學校使用手機被學校處分，他感到很困惑，寫信給你求助。請根據(jù)以下提示給李華回信。所給要點必須寫到外，自己可以適當補充相關細節(jié)。詞數(shù)120左右（信的開頭與結(jié)尾已給出，不計入總詞數(shù)）
1: 手機的優(yōu)點：聯(lián)系方便
2: 帶手機上學的問題：影響教學，花大量時間打手機有害學習和健康
Dear Li Hua,
Your letter reached me yesterday. It said in your letter that you were punished for using cellphones, which puzzled you.
                                                                              
                                                                              
Best wishes.
Yours,
Wang Ping

Answer 1

A possible version:
Your letter reached me yesterday. It said in your letter that you were punished for using cellphones, which puzzled you.
There is no doubt that cellphones can bring us much convenience. We can keep in touch with friends and families wherever they are. Besides, the cellphone is a way to fun.
However, there are some problems with using cellphones. The ring of phones can disturb teachers and students in the class. It has been proved that often using cellphones does harm to health. Another problem is that some students can spend too much time and money on cellphones and sending messages, which will result in bad results in study.
As a student, he should concentrate on study. It is right for school to prevent you from using cellphones.

試題分析：本文屬于半開放性提綱式書信體，英語寫作是一種創(chuàng)作性的學習過程。啟動知識信息儲存，構思立意，謀篇布局，遣詞造句，對語言表達的正確性和準確性、思維的邏輯性和文章的條理性都比口語要求更高。先審題，弄清寫作要求，審題是寫好作文的前提，理清思路，確定體裁、框架結(jié)構和內(nèi)容。提醒考生注意時態(tài)及語態(tài)的使用。
【亮點說明】文中使用了非常好的短語和句子為文章增色不少，比如There is no doubt that cellphones can bring us much convenience., does harm to health, It said in your letter that you were punished for using cellphones, which puzzled you. It is right for school to prevent you from using cellphones還運用了which引導的定語從句等等。并注意了句子的銜接如： However；Besides等等。