Question

假設(shè)你是李華，是一名高三學(xué)生。你的同班同學(xué)王強因患白血�。╨eukemia）而住院，目前已經(jīng)花光了家里的所有積蓄，現(xiàn)在需要骨髓移植（bone marrow transplant）, 需要20萬元。請你幫他寫一封求助信。要點如下：
對病人的簡單介紹；
目前的困難；
希望得到捐助；
聯(lián)系電話：白天5221600；晚上5221610
注意：1.詞數(shù)100左右，開頭和結(jié)尾已給出，不計入總詞數(shù)；
2.可適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)，以使行文連貫。
Dear friends,
I’m very sad to tell that
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Yours truly，
Li Hua

Answer 1

Dear friends,
I’m very sad to tell you that my classmates Wang Qiang, a senior high student, suddenly fell faint when he was preparing the coming college entrance examination. He is suffering from a serious disease “Leukemia”.He has been in hospital for about three months and spent all the money his parents saved.
Wang Qiang is a top student in our class,but he is in hospital now. He is in urgent need of a bone marrow transport. However, his family is too poor to afford the expenses, which total 200000 yuan. How can a poor family afford such high expenses. But time is life, we can’t wait to see such a sunshine boy lose his life.
So your help is badly needed, Let’s do whatever we do to save our fellow student. The life of a lovely boy is in your hand. Your love can save a life. You can contact 5221600 in the daytime and 5221610 at night.
Yours truly,
Lihua

試題分析：這是一篇提綱式作文：題目已經(jīng)交代的具體情況，也給了適當(dāng)?shù)囊�點，因此考生首先要根據(jù)所給提綱，列出要點，并以此為基礎(chǔ)充分發(fā)揮自己的想象力，適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)，靈活運用英語知識，采用不同的表達(dá)方式將各要點完整地表述出來，注意主次分明，詳略得當(dāng)。語言力求準(zhǔn)確、簡潔。根據(jù)情景的發(fā)展，按順序安排好材料。同時應(yīng)選用合適的連接詞或過渡詞，使文章具有一定的連貫性。考生必須認(rèn)真查驗是否有漏寫情況，有無拼寫錯誤及標(biāo)點誤用等
【亮點說明】He is in urgent need of a bone marrow transport. 這句話用了詞組in urgent need of “急需“However, his family is too poor to afford the expenses, which total 200000 yuan.這句話有非限制性定語從句和和too…to…結(jié)構(gòu)。Let’s do whatever we do to save our fellow student這句話用whatever引導(dǎo)的名詞性從句，這些都使得這篇范文讀起來順暢