Question

高考臨近，許多家長用金錢，旅游等承諾鼓勵孩子努力學習，考上一所好大學。假定你是高三學生李華，請根據(jù)所提供的有關(guān)信息，給某英文報社寫封短信。
內(nèi)容要點：
1.許多家長用金錢，旅游等承諾鼓勵孩子努力學習，考上一所好大學；
2 可能會導致學生只關(guān)注物質(zhì)獎勵，而減少學習樂趣；
3.一旦獲得想要的獎勵就失去了學習動力；
4.你的建議。
注意：1.不要逐詞逐句地翻譯。
2 為使語句連貫，可以適當增加細節(jié)。
3 詞數(shù)100左右，信的開頭和結(jié)尾已給出，不計入總數(shù)。
Dear Editor,
With the college entrance examiation approaching…
Yours truly,
Li Hua

Answer 1

Dear Editor,
With the college entrance examiation approaching, many parents try to encourage their children to study hard and be admitted into a famous university. They promise that they will be
rewarded with things such as money, traveling and so on once they achieve the goal.
However, I don’t think this is a proper way. Firstly, it may lead to the fact that children’s attention will focus on such things instead of the pleasure of studying, Secondly, they may stop working hard as soon as they get what they want.
I think a wise way is to make us aware of the importance of going to a good university. Besides, we should have much knowledge for our furure. What’s your opinion?
Yours truly
Li Hua

試題分析：本書面表達是一篇提綱類書面表達。第一步：審題。分析題目和提綱可知，這封書信的體裁應該是議論文。論點是“家長用金錢，旅游等承諾鼓勵孩子努力學習是不確當?shù)摹�，陳述要點并說明理由。因文章需要發(fā)表自己的意見，故使用第一人稱。第二步：構(gòu)思。文章應該按照“總——分——總”的結(jié)構(gòu)分為三段。考生在寫作之前必修認真審題，首先要注意文章的時態(tài)。不能根據(jù)材料逐字逐句的翻譯應該注意句子的銜接，以提高作文的檔次。
【亮點說明】文中使用了非常好的短語和句子為文章增色不少，比如encourage sb. to do，be admitted into，achieve the goal，focus on, instead of，as soon as，make sb. aware of；還運用句型with引導的復合結(jié)構(gòu)，同位語從句。并注意了句子的銜接如：once，firstly，secondly，however，besides 等等。